The 49th Guide To: Getting affordable company.

Companionship is a very important part of our lives and for most of you that can’t seem to keep one actual person to yourself at a time, for reasons ranging from boredom to them being too broke to afford you, you can always get a pet. And since we’re always on the lookout for ways to make your life easier, we give you 5 pets that can take the place of actual people in your lives:

  1. Dogs
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As expected, puppies are the first choice of pets in this environment. They’re generally accepted and well they don’t always have evil spirits unlike you know who. They can even help you fish out ghosts that are hiding in your wardrobe. You don’t need to get the expensive ones, just book for one of the puppies of that bingo down your street. Bring it out of poverty to a higher social class and make sure you get a loyal dog that can’t run, can’t bark but will at least feed on your concoction rice without complaining.

2. Kittens

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If you want a cat as a pet, make sure you’re not living with your mother in Africa. If you insist on doing this, don’t be surprised if she has bathe your kitten in anointing oil one morning because it was staring at her in a weird manner.

3. Chicken

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The good part of keeping chickens in your home is that you get to feast on their eggs. Especially as Nigeria is currently on the level that one egg can buy you a plot of land in Ikorodu, this is the surest source of protein for you. Play with their mother in the morning, feast on her products of conception at night.

4. Goat

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You’ll relate to keeping a goat as a pet if you have similar traits like them. When the goat doesn’t listen to you, you can see yourself in it. Getting life lessons and undeniable loyalty.

5. Lion

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There’s categories to owning a pet lion. In Nigeria, you can borrow one of those in our public zoos and get it in your backyard. The trick is to starve the lion till it forgets it’s a lion. Then you two can have heart to heart chats occasionally on how life is fickle and even a lion can do nothing, other than expect eba and okro from you.

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