Breaking Confines While Creating Magic : Tolu Ayoka

Tolu Ayoka is a talented artist who mainly creates grand-style portraits. Through their creations, they combine fantasy and the exploration of subversive identities and emotions. Often time, Tolu is communicating through their art. Releasing pent-up feelings, escaping tumultuous emotional states, and creating an out to the bad times. Tolu has always consumed art in its various forms while investigating its’ creation process and meaning.

Tolu is currently 21 years old, sitting at the point where they are still learning themselves and coming out of their shell. Growing up in Lagos, later Ibadan, in a small family consisting of their parents and younger sister. They had a highly Christian, sheltered, and academically focused upbringing. Causing them to have limited interactions with the outer world. This ended up working in their favour; it shaped their interest in art. They would spend their time forming interests through constant media consumption. Anything from comics, albums, magazines, screens or novels for hours.

Additionally, animation and unique character design were two of the things that captured Tolus’ heart anytime they would come across them on TV or while playing video games. Their Christian upbringing forbade many of these activities. However, they refused to tone themselves down. With the added burden of being the eldest sibling in a Yoruba home, it was not always a fun ride. However, they note loving a few parts of their heritage, such as their oriki, “Ayoka.” Ayoka translates to ‘bringer of joy,’ which affirmed parts of themselves that they felt were unseen as a child. Tolu currently resides in Manchester, where they pursued their university education.

Tolu began taking art seriously at 13. Although they cite their first memory of any artist’s expression being when their paternal grandmother gifted them a crayon set. Tolu’s grandma taught them how to colour inside the lines, a boundary they eventually taught their grandma to break. This led to Tolu constantly experimenting with drawing until age 13, when they cemented the drive to progress in their abilities. Dedicating their 2014 summer to drawing on A2 sheets daily with graphite and ink. Tolu was focused on making progress; to see what they could do.

Tolus’ understanding of themselves as an artist has always been present. They always knew they wanted to be creative. They state that they would always respond to people asking them what they wanted to be with, “illustrator, fashion designer, video game developer or cartoonist.” Their answers and sense of self always led them towards artistry. However, as it happens with most people, our world does not cater to that being the goal of a child. Especially a Nigerian child.

With time, by age 8, the question changed to “What do you want to study?” Enforcing the focus on school and structured education as the only path to success and fulfilment in life. Therefore, throwing doubt and uncertainty into Tolu’s sense of self. Tolu began to feel like she wasn’t being taken seriously or even had what it took. Sadly, they internalized some of the discouragement, battling within themselves and losing some solidity in their sense of self.

Regardless of the lack of support, Tolu continued to persevere. Once in a while, their mum and uncles would indulge them by buying them art supplies. Sometimes, Tolu would lie to their family that they needed art supplies for school projects. Continuing to work on furthering their abilities. They needed to affirm their personal desires to create art.

“The more I practiced, the better I got. The less noise I had in my ear, the more faith I had in myself” – Tolu Ayoka, 2022.

When I asked Tolu about their art style, they mention not wanting to be confined by it. After taking a while to figure it out, they want the freedom to explore their craft. However, it is very striking. Their style of cutthroat grand style portraits is done through an eloquent exploration of subversive identities and emotions and portrayed in a fantasy style. They draw pixies and goblins that translate a whole lot of subtext. They began creating more highly saturated works that kept a gothic edge. They did this by using high contrast and detail, bold and intricate strokes alike. Tolu gets a lot of influence from goth subcultures, the 80’s post-punk era, and the pop art and expressionist movements.

Tolu describes their creative process as chaotic, especially when finding it hard to enter a state of creative flow. They liken it to experiencing the five stages of grief; they tend to prepare themselves heavily before accepting that the vision has already been understood. At other times, Tolu likens the process to the most fun they can have. Sometimes, their creations begin as drafts. Other times as research and sourcing or making references for the composition.

Other times it’s just Tolu expressing themselves on the canvas. They love working with layers while mixing textures in digital and traditional pieces alike. But, as a stickler for detail, a large chunk of their process is just them staring. Regular pieces take 6-8 hours to complete. Meanwhile, generally, it can take anywhere from one hour to several months of work to fully complete a piece. Listening to music while creating boosts their spirits; working to music that suits whatever they’re feeling at the time or at night when it’s quiet. Recently, they’ve started painting outside more.

Tolu dedicates their art as homage to their friends and chosen family, who keep them motivated. Also, for the people who see themselves in Tolu’s work. However, the one person that Tolu recognizes as the starting point for where they are now is their grandma, Mrs. Sidiquat Akanbi. It was this remarkable woman whom Tolu spent summers in her house practicing their art, who gave Tolu their oriki and who never projected her fears onto Tolu about choosing art.

Mrs. Akanbi would always encourage Tolu, reminding them to clutch unto and invest in their love for art. Tolu recalls their grandmother speaking of them like they could use art to change the world, especially when they needed it the most. That worked wonders for them. Moreover, Mrs. Akanbi’s children, who are also creatives, showered Tolu with encouragement. Constantly creating that safe space for them to express themselves and materialize their dreams.

Another person Tolu gives thanks to is Grandma Cosiba. They dub her a Star and a force to reckon with. Stating that she is unapologetically herself and strides with confidence. The exact type of figure they love to depict in their artwork. Grandma Cosiba was the one who taught Tolu how to colour, and for that, they are forever grateful.

In terms of inspiration, Tolu cites multiple sources. From their parents’ brothers, their mum, black dark-skin women, other creatives, and people who transcend the gender binary and its restrictions. Basically, people who are rebels; who are unfazed by society’s expectations of them. They hold a lot of love for these people. They believe they are a copy-paste of their mum, who is very confident in her dark skin. This quality is admirable to Tolu, as they realize the demanding reality society tries to confine dark skin women to, with nasty comments and general animosity.

Tolu lists Grace Jones, Janelle Monae, and Santigold as some people that inspire them, along with other black people in alternative spaces. Followed by Samurai Jack’s Genndy Tartakovsky, Manga Artist Hirohiko Arakai and Capcom’s Bengus. These are animators and character designers whose work made them wish they had some involvement. Tolu clarifies what they mean about the spaces the previously mentioned black people exist in. It’s not to say they don’t belong there, but instead to imply that they dared to be themselves.

Ultimately, Tolu hopes that their art spreads the same message; there is no one standard for people who look like or are like them. There are no universal rules that work for everyone. Believing this dwindles your potential, and makes you emulate things that don’t align with who you are. Just following the rules for art made them feel the same way. Sticking to the books stripped them of who they are; just to appeal to others. They didn’t realize it then, but rejecting those ideas was the best decision they could have made.

In Tolu’s words, “There’s nothing more freeing than watching your true self emerge when you stop limiting yourself to what’s expected of you. Even when you don’t know what that looks like, it’ll come through if you let it.”

Depicting darker-skinned characters in an alien manner is Tolu’s idea of finding comfort in themselves without any remorse. Despite the world trying to alienate them. The work Tolu creates might seem otherworldly or unreal. However, it’s rooted in human emotions; vulnerability, anger, loss and pure love. The art is rough around the edges, inconsistent and uncontrolled.

Tolu wants people like them to let go of that pressure to be perfect. Embrace the brilliance of being queer, obscure, and unexpected. Even when it’s opposite the standard, to them, there is more magnificence in growing as your authentic self than letting the world define you.

Although Tolu doesn’t have any exhibitions lined up, they want to collaborate with more artists. A new chapter is on the way for them and their art. After recently experiencing the traumatizing event of being outed to their family. They faced rejection, projection and violence regarding their identity and neurodivergence. Through their support system, they were able to make it through.

So, they decided to channel parts of their feelings about what this year has brought them into their craft. While working on connecting with other creatives and people who might have faced similar events. The community has been their saviour more than ever this year. Therefore they find it extremely important to prioritize and reach out in any way. Even if it means challenging themselves emotionally, opening up, to be more vulnerable. Tolu intends to use a lot more of their personal truth and access tenderness, to conjure up more sentiment, colour and pride in their work moving forward. They’ve been practicing and researching as they move on to more dynamic artwork and candid storytelling.

To hear more from Tolu and check out their work; their website is toluayoka.com. Their twitter handle is @toluayoka and their instagram is @toluayokastudio. I am looking forward to more from Tolu and whatever they endeavour to create. I hope you are too!

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